My mental health isn’t a subject that I like to dwell on too much, because the reality is it isn’t that great, and hasn’t been for a long time but I’ll get more into that in another blog about my struggle with mental health. For now i’ll just stick to the topic of Nature & Noodles and how those two things made me feel alive on June 18th, a 22 degrees chilled summer Monday.
My dad asked me where I would like to go and I mentioned the park, any park just to be outside for a change of scenery rather than staring at my four walls for another nothing filled day in agonising, unavoidable chronic pain. I knew i’d suffer the consequences later on for the outing but I also knew it would be well worth it. My dad picked Dulwich Park which he had never been to before, which actually turned out to be a great option as the parking was right by the entry gates meaning I didn’t have to walk too far. Also, I hadn’t been Dulwich Park in over 5 years and it turns out the park is even more massive than I initially thought because I realised that I had never seen that area of it before.
Suffering from multiple chronic illnesses and mental health I had lost myself, the me before sickness took complete control over my life. It robbed me of joy and the things I once loved so much eventually became a chore to do and actually caused my anxiety to flare up. Simple things like going to the park became a daunting task, which may sound silly but that’s what happens with anxiety and depression it somehow tricks you into believing that the things that are good for you are your biggest enemies, including your relationships with people, family and friends, which isn’t always true.
It took me some time to realise that depression, anxiety and my physical illnesses were robbing me of…well ME. Drawing, painting, photography, playing instruments, being in nature, music, singing, dancing and many other things I enjoyed became so alien to me but now I realise this I want nothing more than to fight against my illnesses.
There’s something about being surrounded by nature that really boost my mood, seeing flowers, hearing the birds singing and breathing in fresh air that instantly gets the happy hormones cheering..
So this is why I set myself the challenge of going to the park after being indoors for so long, I knew i’d feel alive even for just a little while and it was a great accomplishment for me.
It was also the perfect place to have a heart to heart with my dad about my physical and mental health. It took so much out of me to speak up to my dad about how i’m really doing and coping, I cried and just about got words out of my mouth but it was progress to be able to open up and mention my struggles and fears. I never like to talk about my struggles but I feel I was able to do so whilst in the calm setting of the park and I’m glad I did.
I spent a couple hours in the park with my dad which exceeded past what I could manage due to exhaustion but my Doctor did say I’m lacking vitamin D so guess the more rays the merrier. Afterwards we went to an oriental restaurant in Streatham called ‘Slurp’ that sells Chinese, Thai and Japanese food obviously not authentic but quite appetising nonetheless. Oriental food has always been my favourite, Chinese to be precise as I always had an appreciation for the culture and wanted to learn Mandarin for the longest time growing up but now as it stands I’m self-teaching Japanese.
I chose Chilli Yakisoba a Japanese noodle dish, which made it the second time having this plate of deliciousness. As you can see from the photo that I took it is indeed rather scrumptious and officially one of my favourite dishes (no. 16 on the menu if you want to order)………
I suffer from light sensitivity and don’t like to be in places where it’s enclosed with lots of people, so this restaurant is perfect for me to feel comfortable in as the light is low and has a calm ambiance in there and I didn’t go during popular social hours .
It turned out to be such a lovely and chilled day out, something that my dad and I don’t get to do, but i’m glad I went and l’ll cherish 18.6.18 for infinity and hope there’s many more of those outings to come, regardless of the pain i’m in.
I came to the realisation that no matter what I do i’m always going to be in pain so if I can make it out of the house for a little bit it would do me a world of good even if I have to suffer the physical consequence after.
I’ve set myself the challenge to ‘Do More of the Things I Love’ for this summer, whether accompanied by a loved one or by myself.
It’s time to reclaim my life back from physical and mental health! #OneSpoonAtATime
Let’s have a #SpoonieChat, comment…
(1) Your name + Blog page
(2) Do you ever get a chance to speak to your family/loved ones about your physical and/or mental health battles?
Thanks for stopping by.